Wedding Jokews

Wife:          “What are you doing?”
 Husband:    “Nothing.”
 Wife:          “Nothing? You’ve been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.”
 Husband:    “I was looking for the expiration date.”
 Wife:          “Do you want dinner?”
 Husband:    “Sure! What are my choices?”
 Wife:          “Yes and no.”
 Wife:          “You always carry my photo in your wallet.  Why?”
 Hubby:       “When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the  problem disappears.”
 Wife:          “You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you?”
 Hubby:       “Yes!  I see your picture and ask myself what other problem can there be greater than this one?”
 Girl:           “When we get married, I want to share all your  worries, troubles and lighten your burden.”
 Boy:           “It’s very kind of you, darling, but I don’t have any worries or troubles.”
 Girl:           “Well that’s because we aren’t married yet.”
 Son:           “Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.”
 Mom:         “Well, you have done the right thing.”
 Son:           “But mom, I was sitting on Daddy’s lap.”
 A newly married man asked his wife, “Would you have married me if my father hadn’t left me a fortune?”
 “Honey,” the woman replied sweetly, “I’d have married you, NO MATTER WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE!”
 After the exam a father says to his son; “Let me see your report  card.”
 The son replies, “My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents.”
 Girl to her boyfriend; “One kiss and I’ll be yours forever.”
 The guy replies; “Thanks for the early warning.”
 A wife asked her husband:  “What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?”
 He looked at her from head to toe and replied: “I like your sense of humor.”